There once was a neighborhood.This neighborhood was small and had no name but to the inhabitants living there it was home. The neighborhood was three blocks wide and three blocks long. It was filled with simple houses, a park, and a few alleys that not everyone knew about. Every block was an abundance of trees and squirrels running amok. Everyone seemed to get along but there were a few troublemakers. There were three friends Mike, Max, and Marcus who wandered the streets looking for fun. They would play basketball and football in their backyards and spend countless hours exploring their neighborhood.
There was one alley that they loved the most that was in between their houses in the middle of the neighborhood that was seldom used. The boys would use the alley as their hangout and secret meeting place. One sweltering summer day Max found an old slingshot in his attic that took three people to use. He marcus and Mike shot water balloons and whatever they could find and it went far. The day was fun and exciting until the neighborhood troublemakers came. The troublemakers were all brothers and they looked identical. They were all very tall, had bright red hair, and bright green menacing eyes that cut through whoever they looked at. These boys were known as the "harry potter" kids because they resembled harry potter other than the red hair. These boys were known for stirring up trouble and were avoided at all costs by the other children.
This particular summer day the harry potter kids heard the laughter of Mike, Marcus, and Max in the alley and went to check it out. When they saw the three boys shooting water balloons they decided to strike at them with some of their own. The harry potter kids filled up some water balloons and headed back to the alley. At the end of the alley Marcus saw them coming and warned his friends, they each grabbed a handful of balloons and took up positions on either side of the alley. With sweat perspiring down everyones face and the scorching sun bearing down on their backs the first balloon was thrown, the first battle cry was screamed and the battle begun.
After finish reading this story, I wondered what was the results for that water balloon battle. You described your setting and characters' physical traits well. You could also include more conversations in quotation marks into the story. This is a very entertaining story to read.
ReplyDeletei don't think of red-heads as tough kids!! but i think you should describe the battle, since you did a good job at all the other descriptions in the story. There are a few errors
ReplyDelete-the first paragraph isn't clear on whether max mike and marc were the troublemakers
ReplyDelete-like yi said, more conversations
-entertaining